A NOTE FOR MY LOVER ON VALENTINE'S DAY

Yesterday when I was driving to Galentine's Day lunch, hosted by As You Wish, I decided to play your "Top Songs of 2016" playlist, according to Spotify.

From the opening drum blasts of Motley Crue's Kickstart My Heart, to Dr. Dre's classic beats; from Black Flag's soul-ripping vocals, to Jesus and Mary Chain's waves of sedation... each song brought back memories from the year before.

I was reminded all the times in 2016 we stopped what we were doing to have a dance party in our underwear when Rick James' Mary Jane came on. (And your little knee bends!!!)

I remembered the countless trips we took across Hampton Roads' various bridges and tunnels, windows down, while Norman Greenbaum's California Earthquake played in the background, fighting against the wind.

I smiled thinking back on all the times I fussed at you for playing Sir Lord Baltimore because I truly hate that band, and for waking me up at 6AM to the jarring chords of Fugazi. 

I thought back on the meals we've created together listening to Thelonious Monk, Dave Brubeck, and Otis Redding, and the mornings I was woken up to Bad Brains playing at 6:00AM.

I recalled your happiness during the holidays as you listened to the Vince Guaraldi Trio; how your smile was one of pure joy. 

There were memories of mornings we were able to get dressed together with songs we both love setting the tone for our day.

I realized that all those little, everyday things that never really seem like much amount to EVERYTHING.

These are the songs that have made up the soundtrack of our perfectly imperfect life together. 

As with wedding days, it's the in-between minutes where we are our most vulnerable, our essential selves... these are the threads connecting massive, monumental moments, and ones of quiet, reflection, and grief. It's the in-between which gives us substance, and makes us who we are.

So Valentine, with all my heart, I want to say thank you. Thank you for sharing all the moments-- the highest highs, lowest lows, and the gorgeous contentment in the middle. Our substance. And thank you for loving me, us, and our family. 

Happy Valentine's Day Bunny, xoxo

Our first Valentine's Day, February 2006

Our first Valentine's Day, February 2006